Politics and cereal
I am not a political person. Though it makes me sound like a moron, I do not watch the news or read the news. My news source is Facebook, and occasionally Instagram, I actually went off Instagram, but I follow it “anonymously.” Yes, I am mildly pathetic.
And now the only people I follow are “size positive” women who make me feel better about myself. There is definitely a diagnosis for that. I should probably find out what it is and how I can get help. But I really love the woman who tells me that every size woman looks good in a cape. We do! We all look good in a cape! But that has nothing to do with Venezuela, so there’s that.
Poor Husband #1 always tries to fill me in on what is going on in the world. He gets so excited telling me about global events. I try, I really try, but it is all really depressing. Even with not watching the news, I can tell that the world is both sideways and upside down and backwards. Oy. What to do, what to do. Well, as I have said, there is the Netflix rabbit hole, and that takes up a lot of my time. As does watching videos of my blessings from my children. Do you know that I can watch the same video of my Matzo Ball at least 300 times? And every time I see something new about this adorable little creature. It is truly a gift and a miracle. But is it news that he has four teeth? It is certainly the most compelling news to his Babka!
I hear about the new mayor of New York and I wonder how he got there. Am I missing something? Should I have done something? Like what, you ask. I don’t know. The man honestly scares me, and I hope that all my friends and family who live in the city will be safe and not cordoned off into ghettos. We are living in scary times. So let’s take this conversation and make it a little lighter.
Breakfast cereal. I have been dreaming about Captain Crunch. Not with the crunch berries, just the cereal from the captain himself. So I went to Stop & Shop and, lo and behold, the large box was on sale. Needless to say, I was very excited. But then I started to explore the cereal aisle. Why does Fruit Loops now have chocolate loops? That is not cool. Fruit loops are the only loop. Sorry, chocolate loops, you need to leave.
And now there are different flavored Cheerios. No. No cookies and cream Cheerios. What are you people trying to do?? Some cereals just need to be left alone. Cocoa Puffs are the cereal of choice for the chocolatey milk, we don’t need those chocolate Cheerios. This is just one middle-aged woman’s opinion. I like to buy Wheat Chex because my dad really liked them, and I feel I am honoring him when I eat a bowl of them, and then when they start to take effect, I feel even closer to my dad. Good times.
Husband #1 has a very close friend from Monsey, and we met her for lunch the other day. We went to that place in Englewood that sells only gluten-free bagels. Poor Husband #1 was looking for a place to wash, but there wasn’t one because everything was not really bread. I was actually very proud of him that he still ate his food with nary a complaint. So that was good.
We talked Israeli politics during a portion of the meal. It got a little heated, but we worked through it because Husband #1 and this woman have been friends since the beginning of time, so it all worked out fine.
It has come to my attention that I have been writing this column for almost 13 years, almost eight of them in this paper. That is pretty darn cool. If any of you have a favorite column, I would love to hear about it. You can email me at Banjiari@aol.com. Yes, I am an ’80s gal who still has AOL, and there is nothing wrong with that!
Banji Ganchrow of Teaneck is getting excited about visiting her sister in California. Husband #1 will be home alone, so if you see him, just throw him bottles of Fanta and cans of Pringles and he will be fine. Thank you!
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